wishing that a hug and kiss could make everything better

there was a day 

when a hug 

and a kiss on the hurt place,

was enough to bring great comfort

was enough to stem the flow of tears

was enough to calm hearts and promote healing

whether I was on the receiving end, as a child,

or on the giving end as a mom

and sometimes the hugs were more for me than them

there came a day, as my children grew and matured 

that the bruised or bleeding wounds weren't skinned knees and elbows,
nor broken bones

but broken hearts 

and a hug and listening ear went a long way toward soothing the pain
more than once I've wished I could bear my kids pain

tomorrow, Saturday September 21 holds a hurt like that

one of my babies will bury her husband
four my grandbabies will see their dad for the last time

Michael C Maxey was also
a son, 
a brother, 
a nephew,
a son in law,
a brother in law, 
an uncle
a friend
a co-worker

this is a different kind of grief 

my heart aches in places I didn't know it held

knowing where Mike is and that he is not battling anything anymore 
brings great comfort

but it does not minimize the deep pain for any of us
the first family function he missed was his baby girls 8th birthday tonight
I watched my daughter put on a brave smile for her daughter
and thought "I can do nothing less"
so I smiled and sang Happy Birthday with everyone else who tried to make it happy for her

death stinks
it hurts in a way that there is no preparing for
it leaves deep scars in places both seen and unseen
grief can be relentless
it is exhausting
it is universal
it is unique and personal
I wish I could "hug and kiss" healing into place

but I know there is no magic cure

so I will do what I can, when I can 

I will pray continually and welcome others to join me