three and a half years later

this evening I left the house on foot because I wanted to get my 10,000 steps in and I needed to escape the thundering silence that filled my home so I headed to KCU to take care of an errand

as I stepped onto the parking lot blacktop at KCU I knew that there was no possible way I would see Bill on campus but I felt like I should be able to and I caught myself looking for him

it is just three days shy (if this was a leap year) of three and a half years since Bill went to heaven but it still doesn't seem real; and when it does, I wonder-was it only moments or was it a lifetime ago that he was by my side and we walked hand in hand

He may not hold my hand anymore, 

but he still has a strong grip on my heart.

I think he always will.