The Little Engine that Could

Sometimes things are not what they seem.

Out of all the mornings the kids have been here, this is the first morning I had a small someone join me while I was having my time alone with Jesus.

Out of all the books on the shelves, did you notice which one she chose? This is the first time this trip she's asked me to read to her. Of course I said yes. Who could say no to a sweet face like that asking in her sweet little voice, "Grandma, will you read to me?" And I figured God would understand the delay. The surprise was on me.

This book is a classic. One I read as a child, one I read to my children multiple times and one I've read to several of the grandchildren. A book about working hard, not being too proud or busy to help, being kind. A book chosen especially for me to read today. When I got to this part of the story, I almost broke down in tears

because at 5 am this morning I woke from a sound sleep. By 7 am I knew I was that little red engine, happily doing my job, excited to do all the things I do, until "Then all of a sudden she stopped with a jerk. She simply could not go another inch. " Past experience has made me wise. When my skin began to feel like it was on fire and the hairs of my head felt like they were tingling, I was able to identify the problem quickly. Anxiety was making a full frontal attack. This is different from simply being worn out and needing to rest. I knew that if I didn't address it, "She tried and tried, but her wheels would not turn." Would be my story. It happened in 2012 and I spent weeks in my room because I didn't know what was happening.

Ain't nobody got time for that if you can help it.

If you haven't read the story, in the end a small, kind blue engine stops and though she is not the correct size to pull a full train over the mountain she agrees to try. "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can..." turns into "I thought I could, I thought I could, I thought I could" as she successfully makes it over the mountain and everyone celebrates. My little blue engine consists of the family and friends that I texted asking for prayer, my family doctor who made a tele-health call to me early this afternoon and the pharmacy that filled the prescription he called in. 

Sometimes things are not what they seem. 

I was smiling on the outside, but sobbing on the inside.

I was calm (mostly) while I read the book,

but on the inside I was a tangled mess.

The little red engine could, until she couldn't anymore. 

She recognized her need and asked for help.

Accepting the help offered allowed the work to be done.

I am thankful for all the parts of the little blue engine in my life,

because I simply could not go another inch.

Friend, if you are the little red engine today-

don't be too proud to ask for help.

If you are someone's little blue engine-

thank you for your kindness and willingness to carry the load.

PS

Don't be distracted or discouraged by those who are more "prepared" or "suited"

like the Passenger and the Freight train engines 

because if the willingness isn't there, the ability and skill is worthless.

If God calls you to a job,

He will certainly equip you with what you need.