Where does my strength come from?

One of Monday's treasures is this photo of Susan, Aunt Judy and me 

I wish my Aunt Judy was not in delicate health. I want her to be sitting in her house offering me a Whitman's chocolate or a cookie and something to drink. She is a strong woman. Always has been. It is strange and uncomfortable to see her where she is. I don't like it. Though our communication has not been consistently frequent, our bond runs deep. Facing the fact that she is not going to be here for years and years is hard, and the thought that she is the last of the extended Ellis family that I grew up with is harder to accept. 

That changed Saturday. 

As a result of what Aunt Judy is going through my cousin Sue and I met at the care facility. Our fathers were two of her brothers. There are ten years between us and my memories of her are second hand since the three brother's marriages all ended in divorce while we were still kids. What germinated Saturday blossomed Monday as we shared some of where we have been, where we are and where we hope to go. Our time together revealed that we share more than DNA. All three of us are strong women. 
We are survivors, not victims. 

One of Tuesday's treasures

This morning I was compelled to take this picture.

This wild violet is a snapshot of our lives. 

It is a survivor too. 

It is a reminder. 

Life happens in brokenness.

Beauty can be found in unexpected places.

Sometimes we find ourselves in situations or circumstances we would never choose to have to push through. Sometimes the beauty and value of life is enhanced by the degree of difficulty required and endured in order to live it.

Another Tuesday Treasure.

I have no idea of who this is but when I saw them I needed a picture. I can only imagine what they have survived together. Seeing them made me smile and my heart rejoice even as it broke anew and I wanted to cry. 

This is a snapshot of what was supposed to be me and Bill in another 20 years. 

Older. Grayer. Looking out for one another with gentleness and kindness. 

It is only because I know Jesus that I have strength to not only survive my loss, but to be happy there are people living what my dream was without growing bitter. I must choose daily to grow, to look for beauty, and to be open to new dreams and realities. Some days are harder than others but I am never alone.