Home, sweet home

See that lime green item at the bottom of the photo, in the middle? That is the one item I went to Dollar Tree to buy Wednesday evening before I headed out to Anita's. Those two gray bags full of stuff also ended up in my cart. 

Hot Tamales were one of those impulse buys. I figured I'd eat about as many as you see on the counter. I opened them on my way to Anita's which is about a 15 minute drive from my house. I was only 10 minutes in and realized the box was almost empty. I wasn't hungry, I was eating my feelings and apparently I had a lot of feelings I wasn't aware of. I spent the last few minutes of the drive trying to identify and acknowledge what was bothering me. 

I was home sick.

Yes, I am in Grayson.

Yes, I own a home here.

However, as my son Jonathan so eloquently explained it recently; 

"Home is not a place, it is the people you love." 

And tonight I was missing my people fiercely.

When I arrived at Anita's I left the Hot Tamales in the car and spent a couple of hours on her swing, enjoying the peace of country living and the beauty of her memory garden and sweet fellowship. 

I haven't eaten any more Hot Tamales. As a matter of fact, those that remain are headed for the trash can. My feelings are settled. My heart is at rest. As I drove home and watched the sky light up with color I realized with complete clarity why I am always looking up. I am homesick, for a place I have never been, hungry to be with the Love of my life, Jesus. I think subconsciously I am often hoping to see Him breaking through the sky, returning to take me and His other beloved ones home.

" And then at last, the sign that the Son of Man is coming will appear in the heavens, and there will be deep mourning among all the peoples of the earth. And they will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven with power and great glory. And He will send out His angels with the mighty blast of a trumpet, and they will gather His chosen ones from all over the world—from the farthest ends of the earth and heaven." Matthew 24:30-31

The song Sweet Beulah Land also comes to mind as I write tonight:

I'm kind of homesick for a country
To which I've never been before.
No sad goodbyes will there be spoken
For time won't matter anymore.

Beulah Land (Beulah Land) I'm longing for you (I'm longing for you)
And some day (And some day) on thee I'll stand (Someday we will stand)
There my home (There my home) shall be eternal (Eternal)
Beulah Land, sweet Beulah Land

I'm looking now, just across the river
To where my faith, shall end in sight (Shall end in sight)
There's just a few more days to labor.
Then I will take my heavenly flight.

Beulah Land (Beulah Land) I'm longing for you (I'm longing for you)
And some day (And some day) on thee I'll stand (Someday we will stand)
There my home (There my home) shall be eternal
Beulah Land, sweet Beulah Land
Beulah Land, oh it's Beulah Land
Oh Beulah Land, sweet Beulah Land