let's talk about intimacy...

intimacy

I started dwelling on it while singing at church this morning
does that admission seem out of place?
shock you?
surprise you?
make you uncomfortable?
is it an inappropriate thing to discuss openly-
I hope it doesn't offend you, but if it does, please keep reading to understand

let's begin with the definition of intimate:
closely acquainted; familiar, close.

private and personal.

As I looked at the stage I began to envision my intimate relationships. I thought about what they would look like if they were unfolding on the platform in front of me, with an audience looking on, and the only time we were together was Sunday morning for a few minutes.

intimacy in friendship:

Have you ever had a friendship where there was a gap between how you and the other person see the relationship? Maybe they broadcast the title “best friend” because they shared something intimate with you, and maybe keep sharing, but they never stop to get to know you, your heart and thoughts. Or maybe you’ve been vulnerable with someone who hasn’t been willing to share that same level of transparency. Maybe there are people in your life you once shared an intimate relationship with, but something happened or didn't happen, and a wall was built or a chasm opened up and the intimacy dissolved.  

On the other side of that are "our people". The ones who are close enough that we can tell, by looking at one another's face or posture, or hearing the inflection in our voices if there is something deeper going on in our lives that we aren't willing to share with the "world". Even if it's been an extended amount of time since we were last together physically, we can pick up right where we left off because intimacy has woven our hearts together. That intimacy was birthed and is sustained by continual, reciprocal, interest and investment of time and energy.

intimacy with my husband:

When we think about couples and intimacy, our minds often think about sex. While sex can be intimate, intimacy is not about sex. It is possible to engage in sexual behavior and never share intimacy. Intimate sex involves our whole being-mind, body, emotions, thoughts and soul. Intimate or not, there are very few people who would share even non-intimate sexual acts in public. They are carried out in private, behind closed doors.

on the other side of this door is my home library where I meet with God

intimacy with God:

If the only time I spent with God was here, in this building, surrounded by people, focused on the ones leading music or listening to someone share the announcements or a message from a portion of Scripture, could I claim an intimate relationship with Him? I think that would be like my friends who say we are close, but never invest time or energy into our relationship. It would be like a having sex with someone whose only goal is to get physical desires satisfied. 

My most intimate conversations and sharing have never happened in a public place for everyone to take part in and witness. Intimacy is established in private. It thrives when we purposefully invest interest, time and energy into the relationship. 

Deep intimacy with God is possible and desirable and beautifully satisfying. Like other relationships, it too is developed and most fully experienced behind closed doors where I can be vulnerable and bare before Him, just the two of us. That intimacy grows when I spend time alone with Him, daily. Our relationship, when shared with others who are in relationship with Him, is positively impacted, but that is not the source from which lasting intimacy flows.

The conclusion of my Sunday morning mind rambling: 

the positive results of intimacy may spill over into public places, (it's often easy to tell by body language which couples are close and which ones may be in the midst of an intense time of fellowship, i.e. an argument,), but intimacy is not built or sustained in an hour a week gathering in a public place.