changes

I have found that 
things that don't look like a "big deal",
things that don't take a lot of time, 
things that aren't really physically challenging
sometimes take the most energy and courage.

When I got my new glider rocker five weeks ago
I had to decide: Reposition or remove Bill's dresser.
Sarah and I moved it out of the bedroom.
I felt an emptiness that was bigger than the open space.
Exhausting.

The glider went where my dresser had been.
My dresser went to the end of the bed.
The space his dresser occupied remained empty until Saturday.
Access to my dresser was limited so I moved it to the open space.
Tiring.

Today I changed pharmacies.
I was satisfied with my old one. 
But a family that is like family opened one several years ago.
I want to support them.
Draining.

The decision making process stresses and fatigues me.
I am finding that the more I practice 
the better I feel about my ability to choose well.
Encouraged. Confident. Comfortable. 
I am getting there one choice at a time.