an open letter to hurting souls this holiday season

dear hurting soul,
as you find yourself in the midst of the holiday season, one that is heavily advertised as "the most wonderful time of the year", a time for families to gather together and celebrate all together, but someone is missing and you feel like this time of year is anything but what it is is advertised to be:

• Know that you are not alone. Yes, you are alone in YOUR grief, but there are others out there who are grieving too. Some alongside you, but none in the exact same way you are. And that is okay. For you and for them.

• Know that it is okay to not feel festive.
• Know that it is okay to enjoy things.
• Know that is okay to laugh.
• Know that is okay to be sad. Even if you know you have countless reasons to be thankful, you can still be sad. 

• Know that almost everything is going to be different.
• Know that there are things you may cling to. As long as they don't cause harm hold on as tight as you need to.
• Know that there may be things you want to get rid of. You might want to consider putting them in a box if you have room to store them until things are not quite so raw.

• Know that is okay to do or not do the things you once "normally" did. Because nothing is normal.

• Know that you may be tired "for no reason at all."
• Know that you might find yourself angry at people who seem to take for granted what you are missing. Find a way to let that anger go, it will eat you alive.

• Know that life may seem surreal at times.
• Know that you may feel jealous of people who still have it "all". That doesn't make you bad, it makes you human. Don't let it grow roots, that isn't healthy.

• Know that you may forget and find yourself looking for a perfect gift. A gift you no longer need to look for. And it is okay to cry because you wish you did.

• Know that you WILL make it through this, unless the Lord calls you home. It may not be easy, it probably won't be pretty at times, but you can and you will make it through. And at the end you may very well look back and wonder how you did what you did.

• Know that though I may not know you, I am familiar with the road you are travelling and I know these things to be true because I am in my third season without my beloved husband. 
• Know that I love you and I am praying for you.  I may not know you, but I often find myself praying for hurting hearts.

Most importantly, know that there is a God who sees you. He knows about pain and suffering and sacrifice. He loves you more than anyone on earth could ever love you. And He loves with a perfect, sacrificial love that has the power to change your life. If you know Him, you know the power I speak of. It is the power to give hope and strength and comfort and joy and peace that is unexplainable. And I am praying that if you do not know Him, that you will find in Him in this season that celebrates the birth of His Son. If I can help you find your way, please message me.

love and prayers always,

Donnette