the apple of His eye

a peek at what was going on in my head this afternoon:

"I am sure no one else is doing this,

it's the wrong time of year"

"but when you get a great deal on apples...

is there a wrong time to make applesauce and sugar free apple butter?"

"I think not!"

"what in the world was I thinking? this job will never end!"

"I am so glad the guys aren't working today"

"I have never not added sugar to my apple butter...I hope it tastes okay"

"why do I want to cry? I am making applesauce for Pete's sake!"

"oh. the last time I did this Bill was alive."

"the kids had so much fun using the food mill when they were little!"

"the grandbabies will enjoy this apple butter when they are here"

this bag plus a box=
about a bushel of apples

after their bath

peeling and cutting out bad spots

slicing and filling several large bowls

small batches won't burn as easily

cook until they are soft

this is the part the kids liked

turn till all the pulp is off the skins

and you have applesauce

add a few spices...

and you have apple butter
cheating by simmering in a crockpot so it is less likely to burn
(and I am tired of standing and stirring)

I wish there was a way to share with you how delicious my house smells

going from apple to applesauce is a process
apple butter is even more of a process
it takes time
it takes commitment
washing
 inspecting
cutting
heating
stirring
watching
 mashing/pureeing
it changes what was into something totally different
it kind of reminds me of life...

I have thought about Valentine's Day for two weeks

last week I put new flowers at Bill's grave

today I thought, "I miss being the apple of his eye"

tonight, after writing about applesauce and apple butter 

I am reminded of a scripture passage and my heart smiles

"I call on you, my God, for you will answer me;

    turn your ear to me and hear my prayer.

7 

Show me the wonders of your great love,

    you who save by your right hand

    those who take refuge in you from their foes.

8 

Keep me as the apple of your eye;

    hide me in the shadow of your wings"

Psalm 17:6-8