the most wonderful time of the year... Is it?

We are in the roaring beginning of what is touted as
"The Most Wonderful Time of the Year".
Songs tell us what makes it so.
Commercials and ads show us what makes it so.
I have one simple question.

Who do I see about false advertising?

because there are some things I know to be true:
not everyone celebrates the holidays
not everyone likes Christmas music
(gasp)
sad, but it is reality
not everyone has the resources
to have a table groaning with food
to hide a tree behind mountains of gifts
to host a large group of friends and or family

some are barely making ends meet
and would count themselves fortunate 
to have any kind of shelter
to have food enough for one small meal today
to have adequate clothing to ward off the elements

there are those who are missing loved ones due to
a job
military service
death
divorce
separation
alzheimers 
dementia
unrealized dreams
a series of unfortunate events
and for us, this is about as far away from
"the most wonderful time of the year"  
as you can get


Do you find it strange that who is not with us
can block our view of who is?
And what we have 
does not make up for what we do not have?

I know there are those of you who are in full agreement with
"it's the most wonderful time of the year"
and to you I say wholeheartedly;
"Enjoy this time. Do not take it for granted. Make good memories."
I also would urge you
please, please, please,
be mindful of friends who are hurting.
Do not rub salt in their wounds.

Not sure what I mean?
Let me give you an example.
Last year I braved going to a Christmas Party.
I was done long before the festivities were over.
I said my goodbyes.
One friend said
"Don't rush off. You don't have anyone waiting at home." 
I know the heart of this person.
They would never in a million years intentionally hurt me.
I believe they would take a bullet for me.
But that comment was like a knife to my heart.

I wanted to scream:
"I know I don't have anyone waiting at home!
I should. 
I want to. 
But I don't.
And that is why I have to leave. 
Now. 
The majority of you are here with your spouse.
And I will never be anywhere with mine again."

I walked to my car with tears streaming. 
For myself. 
For them if they realized what they said.

And what do I say, 
again wholeheartedly, 
to those who think this is NOT the most wonderful time of the year?

look for one thing to be thankful for every day
no matter how small, find something
acknowledge your pain when it knocks on your door
cry when you need to you
accept the gifts of joy or happiness that knock on your door,
no matter how tiny or fleeting
laugh when you can
be kind to yourself
don't believe the lies
You are not the only one