When the road takes an unexpected turn

Bill and I were on this journey together, 
we had weathered a lot of miles on the road
and we had new places mapped out to explore.

Then August 26-29th happened.

My husband rarely missed a day of work, 
even if he should have,
so when he came home from work early that Tuesday morning
and agreed to go to the doctor that afternoon,
I knew we were facing a bump in the road.

Kidney Stones was what his symptoms pointed to-
I had passed one a few years ago, 
I knew how painful they were 
and was glad to have the "bump" identified.
It was a only temporary delay.

We were facing a rest stop experience.

Bill's doctor visit Thursday,
with an explanation that the testing on Wednesday 
showed it was NOT kidney stones,
with a re-route directly to the hospital 
made me realize we were at a cross roads.
Though we had been through overnight hospitalization for me,  
(five birthing experiences and a few surgeries)
this was his first overnighter. 
We thought it was just a new experience to add to our trip.

It turned out to be more of a crossroads than we imagined.
His traveling days are over.
He is home.
My destination is the same as his,
but I am on a major reroute,
figuring out how to go on without my partner.
I am not in despair, 
I have full assurance I will make it.
Just not the way I envisioned the traveling to be.

The road I was on closed 27 weeks ago.

My destination has not changed,
but this way of getting there is strange.
It is very different traveling alone
when you are accustomed to having a companion,
someone to read the map and do the planning alongside you.

I see old sights with fresh eyes.
I am learning to navigate this new path.
I am learning to trust my decision making.
I am being loved more fully than I could ever imagined being loved
without having my husband here to do the loving.

I see God working in this unexpected turn.

I am glad I don't know what the road ahead looks like.
Some of it would frighten me into an inability to take the next step.
It is enough, for me, to trust that God knows and is in control.

Bill shared this song with me. 

I use it as one of my navigational tools.