Gatlinburg

I am in Gatlinburg this weekend.

 

This weekend is...

My first vacation as an adult without Bill. Ever.

My first vacation with a group of adult friends. Ever. 

My first night in a king sized bed by myself. Ever.

 

Last night was...

Not my first night falling asleep with tears dripping on my pillow. Probably not my last.

Not my first night thinking "I can't sleep in this bed."

Probably not my last.

Not my first night waking through out the night with dreams. 

Probably not my last.

  

This morning is...

My first time sitting on a deck with a cup of Starbucks blend coffee.

My first time sitting on a bent hickory porch swing looking at the hills.

My first time having a dream where I came downstairs, surprised to find my daddy sitting on the couch in the midst of my friends. I sat on his lap like a little girl, put my head on his chest and he held me tight as I cried. It was beautiful.

What a sweet reminder of the truth of Psalm 121.

"I lift up my eyes to the hills.

    From where does my help come?

My help comes from the Lord,

who made heaven and earth...

He who keeps you will not slumber...

The Lord is your keeper;...

He will keep your life.

The Lord will keep

your going out and your coming in

from this time forth and forevermore."