one of "those" days

We all have them.
At least, I think we all do.
What made it "one of those days" for me today?

I woke up angry.
For no apparent reason.
I did not go to bed mad, 
I did not have a bad dream that I remember,
But when I took my walk this morning I discovered I was angry.

I had a "birthday surprise" from Panera Bread.
When I got there it was 1:30 and I hadn't had lunch.
I ordered broccoli cheese soup in a bread bowl.
As I ate I realized I don't enjoy being at a restaurant alone. 
Not at all.

I continued with my planned shopping trip,
hoping to get a few things to wear when we go to Costa Rica.
At one store I tried on 29 different articles of clothing.
Twenty nine.
And not one thing fit properly.

As I finished shopping a downpour started.
I felt my stress level rising.
A hydroplaning experience 25 years ago still plays on my mind.

The storm raging outside 
had nothing on the one raging inside of me.
Tears rolled down my face.

As I gripped the steering wheel,
my head pounding in time with the rain,
I poured out my heart in prayer.
"I am tired."
"I don't want to be driving in this."
"I want to be held."
"I am lonely."
"I know You are there, but I want someone to be here."
"Please get me home safe."
"I just want to be wrapped up in someones arms and hugged tight."
I was mentally going through a list of people who give great hugs,
wondering who I could call when I arrived back in Grayson.

Usually I drive without the radio on,
but I made a phone call through the car
so K-Love was on.
Slowly the words to the chorus of the song that was playing
penetrated my mental and emotional turmoil:
"There will be a day with no more tears
No more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place
Will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to You always"
Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/jeremy-camp/there-will-be-a-day-lyrics/#RZSbzwpyw8vOAFIM.99


(This was a video of Jeremy Camp singing "There Will Be a Day".
Now it is not available and I can't delete this from my post.)

Tears of thankfulness mingled with tears of grief.
Words of praise for God's faithfulness 
and the promises He has made 
were interrupted by another song
as the torrential rainstorm continued.

David Crowder's I AM.

Ahhh, peace.
Honestly, I still wanted a hug,
but I had peace and my heart was being held.
When I told Sarah about my afternoon
she stopped what she was doing to hold me.

A little later Andrew and Bre came to the house for dinner.
Neither of them knew what my afternoon had been like.
Andrew wrapped me up in his arms in a long hug.

Tonight I am thanking God it has been "one of those days"-
a day I was reminded 
that I am God's beloved.
He is holding onto me.
Always.
And when I need it, 
He will send human arms to hold me too.