a shot at life
I got my Tdp (tetanus, diphtheria, pertussis shot) yesterday morning.
My arm got progressively sore as the day wore on.
Today it is more sore.
It kind of feels like I got kicked in the arm by a mule.
As I drove to Sarah's today I was pondering.
Grief.
Tdp shots.
Every time I move my arm
I am reminded of what happened yesterday.
Every time I forget and lean against it,
or accidentally brush against it,
I am quickly made aware by the pain.
I want to bind it up and hold it close to my body
as I lay on my opposite side under a big, soft blanket.
Even though I know it would still hurt,
I want to pretend it wouldn't.
Ignoring the pain does not make it go away.
Life continues.
It doesn't stop because I am in pain.
There are things I still want and need to do.
I may have to make adjustments in they way I work,
but I need to keep moving, to keep focusing on what is ahead
because I am going to give this life my best shot.
Not content to simply exist,
I want to live completely, lavishly, joyfully, in spite of the pain.
I was reminded of something by a friend last night-
"Back on January 4, 2015 I challenged a few of my friends to pick a word or a verse from the bible and make it yours for the year. I want you to know that I have been praying for you. I now want to know your story. So take some time and let me know what did God reveal to you in 2015 with his word that he gave you..."
This was my reply in January:
I am resolved to live life to the full. Jesus is the reason John 10:10 "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.'
This was my "update" last night:
Thank you for your prayers! And I so needed this reminder tonight! It has been "one of those days" and it would be very easy to feel sorry for myself and focus on what I have lost rather than on what I have. The truth is, I continue to be resolved to live life to the full. The only way I can do that is to continue to lean, and I mean lean hard, more fully every day on Jesus. Satan attacks strongly-he fights dirty-he whispers lies and I have to focus on the Truth's that I find in the Bible and not on how I am feeling. Feelings are fickle. Truth never changes and is a much more solid foundation to build life choices on. I begin each day opening the Word and praying, spending time alone with God. Every night before I go to bed I think back over the day and find one thing that I count as a gift received that day and write it in my "amazing Grace" journal. I journal victories and struggles of the day in a calender. I pray through my prayer lists-one of those who need Jesus, one of people I know and love who are in vocational ministry, one of people who are grieving the loss of a loved one(s), one of my soccer family and one of just requests. Every day I find and post on FB something I am thankful for. I have been learning more fully just how much I need God, and how incredibly faithful He is to provide what I need when I need it. And it seems to be His delight to do it in ways I would never think of, so I am learning even more to not "limit" Him. I am learning the rewards of trusting and obeying especially when I don't understand. My life is more full, more rich now than it was January 4, 2015. God has been and continues to work in my life-and I am so thankful to be His."
My arm got progressively sore as the day wore on.
Today it is more sore.
It kind of feels like I got kicked in the arm by a mule.
As I drove to Sarah's today I was pondering.
Grief.
Tdp shots.
Every time I move my arm
I am reminded of what happened yesterday.
Every time I forget and lean against it,
or accidentally brush against it,
I am quickly made aware by the pain.
I want to bind it up and hold it close to my body
as I lay on my opposite side under a big, soft blanket.
Even though I know it would still hurt,
I want to pretend it wouldn't.
Ignoring the pain does not make it go away.
Life continues.
It doesn't stop because I am in pain.
There are things I still want and need to do.
I may have to make adjustments in they way I work,
but I need to keep moving, to keep focusing on what is ahead
because I am going to give this life my best shot.
Not content to simply exist,
I want to live completely, lavishly, joyfully, in spite of the pain.
I was reminded of something by a friend last night-
"Back on January 4, 2015 I challenged a few of my friends to pick a word or a verse from the bible and make it yours for the year. I want you to know that I have been praying for you. I now want to know your story. So take some time and let me know what did God reveal to you in 2015 with his word that he gave you..."
This was my reply in January:
I am resolved to live life to the full. Jesus is the reason John 10:10 "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.'
This was my "update" last night:
Thank you for your prayers! And I so needed this reminder tonight! It has been "one of those days" and it would be very easy to feel sorry for myself and focus on what I have lost rather than on what I have. The truth is, I continue to be resolved to live life to the full. The only way I can do that is to continue to lean, and I mean lean hard, more fully every day on Jesus. Satan attacks strongly-he fights dirty-he whispers lies and I have to focus on the Truth's that I find in the Bible and not on how I am feeling. Feelings are fickle. Truth never changes and is a much more solid foundation to build life choices on. I begin each day opening the Word and praying, spending time alone with God. Every night before I go to bed I think back over the day and find one thing that I count as a gift received that day and write it in my "amazing Grace" journal. I journal victories and struggles of the day in a calender. I pray through my prayer lists-one of those who need Jesus, one of people I know and love who are in vocational ministry, one of people who are grieving the loss of a loved one(s), one of my soccer family and one of just requests. Every day I find and post on FB something I am thankful for. I have been learning more fully just how much I need God, and how incredibly faithful He is to provide what I need when I need it. And it seems to be His delight to do it in ways I would never think of, so I am learning even more to not "limit" Him. I am learning the rewards of trusting and obeying especially when I don't understand. My life is more full, more rich now than it was January 4, 2015. God has been and continues to work in my life-and I am so thankful to be His."
Comments
Post a Comment
thank you for taking the time to share