Love, Crazy Kate and Tenacious Tim

Christmas is about love.

Weddings are about love.

Kate and Tim's wedding just 2 weeks before Christmas

focused my thoughts on the extent love will go to be expressed.

Let me introduce you to them and share part of their story.

Kate. Crazy Kate to her friends, came into my life while she was a student at KCU. She was part of a group of friends Andrew brought to the house on a regular basis to study and hang out. She was also part of a small group of girls I was able to share the Bible with once a week. 

Tim. Quiet. Seems opposite to Kate. I was drawn to him. He was "real". I don't remember him ever being in my home, but I spent time with him at Andrew and Bre's apartment where he studied and hung out. 

I was intrigued by the bits and pieces of their story I heard and wanted to know more so I sent Kate the following message:

"How did your relationship "evolve?" I have gathered from snippets I have heard you were not interested, but it appears Tim was. Did you know he was coming? (to Thailand) How long had you been there? If you were not interested, did his pursuing you to Thailand sway you? Share anything you want to that will shed light on the extent love is willing to go and how it changes our lives."

Kate's response:

Our relationship really evolved over e-mails, once I was in Thailand. We met my last semester at KCU in spring of 2013. I was really impressed with him, and could tell he liked me, but since he was younger I thought there wasn’t a chance of anything developing between us. 

I went to Mozambique for three months the September after I graduated, and Tim wrote me a letter while I was there, but it never arrived. From there I moved to Thailand that December, and once I arrived there Tim started Facebooking me. We talked quite a bit, and our friendship really blossomed. 

I came back to Kentucky for a visit that summer (2014) and one day while I was on campus Tim shared how he felt about me. What stuck out most was he said, “I’m incredibly attracted to you because I see so much of Christ in you.” It was literally the most flattering thing he could have said to me, but I still thought he was too young so I rejected him. I was too stubborn to see he was perfect for me. As I was pulling my car away, I remember it hitting me how long it would be before I saw him again, feeling this huge sadness, and all of a sudden realizing how deeply I really did care about him. I thought about telling him, but decided to give it time to make sure I wasn’t just flattered by all the sweet things he had said.

Even after that, though, Tim just kept trying to be my friend. And I think that was when I started to fully realize how much he cared about me. I saw that he would still be my friend even if I led him to believe nothing would develop between us. He really started to win me over through that. 

That September, he asked if he could come visit me in Thailand the coming December. I was shocked and didn’t know what to say. I didn’t write back for a week, because I didn’t want him to come that far when I still wasn’t sure how I felt, but eventually I told him I would be happy to see him.

We kept e-mailing, and over the next couple months, I fell hard and fast. He was just exceptionally genuine and sincere, and I was really drawn to that. I had never met anyone like him. By the time he came in December, I was crazy about him. We started officially dating the week he came for a visit, and I moved back to America the following April. We got engaged the following August, and were married December 12 – precisely one year after he boarded a plane to come see me in Thailand. smile emoticon

We had been friends for two years when we started dating, and dated for a year before we were married. When we first started dating, we had only seen each other 5 days in the past 20 months! 

I asked Tim to share a little of his side, and he said,

“To me, the waiting for you for two years speaks more than going on a plane ride. That was harder for me. When I came to Thailand I was looking forward to spending money to go see you – I wanted to do that. The hardest part was waiting.

When you came back from Thailand the first time, I was nervous because I knew it was my chance to tell you how I felt. So I was excited to see you, but also nervous because I knew it was my only chance. Even when you didn’t express the same feelings, I didn’t give up. 

Then you left. And then I was just looking forward to talking to you. To being your friend still. 

I didn’t mind waiting because I knew I was going to see you again. Instead of suffering, thinking, 'Woes me, Kate’s gone again,' I was looking forward to when I would see you again. Picturing what it would be like. For some reason, 8,000 miles away, I felt closer to you than anyone 8 feet away from me in America. It’s really funny for me how many times a day I would check to see if I got an email from you. I felt like you were right next door, not 8,000 miles away.”  

I asked why he waited and he said,

"A big part of it was I just wanted to stay your friend. You were the coolest friend I’d ever had, and I wanted to hear all the stories of what you did. I was just really intrigued by you.

I waited because I loved you. I didn’t see anyone else. I adored you. You were the first person I wanted to talk to when something cool happened in my life, and no one else came close. 

I thought that coming to see you was the way to let you see that I loved you. If it took me coming to see you to show you that I didn’t just have a crush on you, it was worth it. 

There was never a single moment where I thought maybe I should be with a different girl instead.”

Seeing both of them seeking hard after God first, 

then building their relationship with each other 

is a beautiful thing to watch.

"Love is patient and kind; 

love does not envy or boast; 

it is not arrogant or rude. 

It does not insist on its own way; 

it is not irritable or resentful; 

it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, 

but rejoices with the truth. 

Love bears all things, 

believes all things, 

hopes all things, 

endures all things."

1 Corinthians 13:4-6