the S word

Submission was the title of the sermon today.

BB (before Bill) submission was not a positive word. I did not see any benefits from choosing to submit to anyone. My understanding of submission would have translated, doormat. And I was not about to let anyone walk on me. 

Part of what Bradley said;
"Submission does not come naturally." 
Amen brother.

When you submit you are saying:
"I love you."
"I trust you."
"I will follow you."
"There is less stress when you are in submission- you aren't held responsible for the outcome if a decision doesn't turn out well."

Eventually I learned and practiced submission in my marriage. 
Even when I didn't understand or agree with Bill's reasoning. 
Why? Because I loved Bill and I knew he loved me. 
He was trustworthy. 
I was willing to follow his lead 
because I knew he was ultimately responsible to God for his decisions.
And I was responsible for my choices. 

Images popped into my head as I sat and listened this morning
to illustrate how submission in marriage benefitted me. 
Submission, partly, is willingly placing yourself under another person. 

Bill became a buffer
my protecter when he could be
a shield between me and the not so pleasant parts of life

blistering heat

blustery winds

blizzards

blowing rain

bouncing rocks 

break downs

bullies

Submission.

Willingly placing myself under the leadership of someone else.
If you had told me 40 years ago I would miss it, I would have called you crazy. 
Over the years I learned to submit to God first and Bill second. 

Don't get me wrong, God is more than enough.
but I would be lying 
if I didn't say that there are times 
I dearly miss that "second layer" of protection, 
of having someone with flesh 
to trust
to love
to protect me
to make the hard decisions and accept responsibility for the outcome.