fear 186/366

All day I have had a dog laying on my feet. Not near my feet. Directly on top of them. Currently it is Sam. Lady and Ivy have each had their turn. I don't mind when it is cool and I have on my Chacos. They keep my toes warm. But in 90+ degree weather, not so much a favorite thing. But I have let them do it without complaining or shooing away.

Fireworks have been exploding in my neighborhood for days now after dark.  My dogs are not fans. At all. And so when the noises are happening they stick close to my side. Last night I was outside until 11:30 with them.

Today is July 4th. The activity has escalated. And it isn't even close to being dark yet. For a time this afternoon Ivy escaped to the "den" she and Lady hollowed out as a sleeping place beneath the kids tree house. Other than that they are, all three, within an arm's reach of wherever I am. Sitting, mowing, hanging out laundry, it doesn't matter, they have been right there with me.

Fear is driving this unusual behavior in my dogs.
The noise.
The unknown.
And for Lady, perhaps a memory from an unpleasant event before she became mine.
Fear drives unusual, and sometimes irrational, behavior in people too.

It has caused me to speak less than the truth.
It has held me captive.
It has stopped me from doing things I wanted to do.

Do you know what calms my dogs?
Being close to me.
Knowing I am the one who takes care of them makes them feel safe.

Do you know what calms me?
Running to Jesus. 
Sitting at His feet. 
Soaking in an awareness His presence.
His kindness and His love are a healing balm for fear and frayed nerves.

"When I am afraid, 

I put my trust in You.

In God, whose word I praise,  

in God I trust; 

I shall not be afraid. 

What can flesh do to me?"

Psalm 56:3-4