going gray

this afternoon 
as I looked back at the section of hallway I had finished painting
but still needed to trim out
I shook my head in amazement
what a difference a new coat of paint makes
the change was a bit disconcerting
a bit frightening
because for almost 40 years, 
since Bill and I set up housekeeping in August 1977,
tan/beige/sand has been a staple color in the common areas of my home 
until today

the first thought that ran through my head was
"leaving the safe beige life for the gray life"
followed closely by
"this is a picture of my recent journey..."
when the life I was comfortable with was snatched away
I had to make a choice
try to hang onto what will never be again
or figure out how to embrace the life I have and make changes
it was frightening and extremely uncomfortable at first
but as time passes I become more familiar with it
and I recognize there are many more shades of beauty to experience